It took me a long time to come to terms with this, but my dreams today are so small.
Thinking about it this morning, since later this week, I get to hang out for an entire weekend with my best friend @ashleygabrielle47, who I’ve known since we were 18.
Back then, I had big plans. Big, unspecific, setting the world on fire plans.
I was going to become a highly paid computer programmer. But when that didn’t pan out (which I learned in college, after Ashley pointed out I could switch majors to something easier, something better suited for the way my brain works, without having to stay an extra year at the tiny, increasingly expensive liberal arts college we attended), I switched into politics.
I left not too long after graduation for DC, a la Mr Smith Goes to Washington, a reference even I am almost too young to get. There, I was going to make connections. Get hired as an aide to my congressperson. Become a lobbyist? I’m not sure. Those dreams were big, but hardly specific.
Today, I woke up thinking about life. And how it doesn’t look at all like I thought I wanted it to when I was 22 years old.
And even my ambitions have shrunk. I’d like to make more money in my business, to be sure. But I’m not trying to be Bezos.
If I found an old oil lamp today, and a wish granter came out, I would wish for vaccines for people under 12, the end of world-sweeping killing viruses, and… I don’t even know the third one.
See, my dreams are small. And most of them are coming true, which is why I’m not asking the genie for help with the building permitting process in the town where I grew up. Because it shouldn’t take magic to be able to build a house.
What are your dreams this morning?